MissNoDrama’s blog

What a wonderful way to begin my new blog. I'll be ranting this out without even thinking, so if you find any errors in my typing or grammar, tell me, m'kei?

1. To you, the person who has been on my mind for quite some time now. No, I am not in love with you.  I love my boyfriend. You're probably just the living proof of my hidden desires. POTRES. May hidden desires pala ako? OMG. Everything between us is just physical. No, wait. Not physical. Mental? No. Emotional? Never. Sexual? Maybe. But who cares? You have your attachments and I have mine. As I told you before, "NO STRINGS ATTACHED". Whatever. I attached myself to you and it's all your fault. Okay, so maybe the fault is also mine, but it's mainly yours. So deal with me whenever I send you numerous text messages asking what you're doing, if you've eaten already, etc. It's pathetic, really. I never wanted this. I never really did. But it happened. And it's happening fast. I'm trying to stop it. All for the sake of my wonderful relationship and my wonderful boyfriend (who has in fact become the meaning and reason of my existence). So please. If you see me as someone no more than just a friend, tell me. I will be very grateful if you'd hurt me now and spare me in the future.

2. And to you, the really lucky girlfriend of the day. I envy you. Because you have someone like him. I've always wanted him. I've always liked him. But it never really entered my mind that we could be a couple. Until now. It's obvious how much you two love each other. Yeah, I thought it was too cheesy at first. But okay. I was jealous. Because you had the chance to be with him. And I haven't. Ang bitter ko. Sorry. Don't worry, I won't ruin your relationship. Never will. But after you, I'd probably go scrambling to him. *flirty grin* Just kidding.

3. Why do you always have to be involved with things? I dreamt about you last night, just like how I dreamt about him, but in a different set-up. I don't like dreaming about you guys. It reminds me of how stupid I was to think that you really saw me as a friend. Okay, now I can confidently tell you this: I NEVER REALLY LOVED YOU. I was on the rebound when you came in the picture. No, you were always in the picture. But I never really knew you were there. But when he  told me it was all a hoax, I was crushed. And you were there. So it happened. I thought I loved you. I really did. I actually believed that we could be together. But it never worked out. Something was just SO WRONG between us. I would've regretted being yours if ever. :/

4. You. Stop calling me. I get irritated whenever you call. I make up excuses, pretending I'm busy or something. But my mom keeps on telling you otherwise. Ugh. She likes you. They all like you. But I don't. Please understand. You are a really good guy (even though nobody really sees it) and you can find someone whom you don't have to force yourself to. It's pathetic, honestly. I just can't bare seeing you get hurt over and over again because of your sheer stupidity. Sorry. Get a life, okay. And find the girl. Please.

5. I miss you. We last saw each other waaaaay back in High School. Ugh. I really do miss you. Your crazy antics, your kinky hair that is now straight, your boy-babbling and the stuff you do that just make me feel so comfortable. I hope we see each other again. Anytime soon.

6. Hey. I'm worried sick about you. I know what happened and we all want you back. In one piece. No suicidal marks, m'kei? I miss you, dear friend. You've always been there for me, even if i don't really realize it. Keep safe.

7. You haven't called me since forever. I miss you! I have so many things to tell you, stuff that I can't really tell you in a day's conversation. Let's get together, m'kei? I'll drag you away from your girlfriend if I have to. Oh, and call me. Now. :p

8. I am genuinely happy for you. Now that you've transferred, I hope you find your way. Your own path. Don't rely on what other people tell you. It's your life. You control it. I don't want you to leave. You are one of the few people who I can really talk to about stuff. And it makes me feel sad that I won't get to see you or be with you anymore. I will miss you. No, I already miss you. Be at my birthday. I will thank you forever.

9. Oh. You. Screw you. You never really grew up. Blah. I don't know why I even bother. You have been a part of my life, no matter how hard I try to push you away. You are the person who first made me feel how it is having an "I'm An Ex!" sign above my head. Anyway, even if you kill yourself now, I won't really mind. You're still the pathetic little loser I've had something with.

10. And to you. My dearest. I cannot thank you enough for everything. In every personal dilemma I've been through, you've been with me ALWAYS, even with the risk of ruining the relationship we have. Thank you for understanding what I'm going through right now. At times, it seems as if I do not deserve you. But you always tell me that I do. I am really sorry for putting you through all of this. But I can never really thank you enough.

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Was that too much? LOL. I've been through worse. :)